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C​.​R​.​I​.​N​.​G​.​E.

by bhyper

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  • Full Digital Discography

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    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of BHYPER REMIX ALBUM 2!, SONGS AND MUSIC, C.R.I.N.G.E. (the beats), C.R.I.N.G.E., olo, HUMAN MUSIC, little man, and BIG BOY. , and , .

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1.
Eat food Eat food Eat food Eat food I'm ordering a hamburger It's got pickles, it's got meat I'm in the kitchen Ready now to eat Got the nice blender Now toss the burger in Then start blending Now it's nice and thin Eat food Eat food Eat food Eat food Got some whole milk To thicken this thing up Now it's all ready I pour into a cup Swish it around some I drool and lick my lips I am now ready To take my first sip Drink food Drink food Drink food Drink food The burger is gone now It's all inside of me I'm starting a new day Happy as can be I just drank a burger With a side of fries I will keep on slurping Till the day I die Till the day I die Till the day I die Till the day I die Till the day I die Drink food Drink food Drink food Drink food Drink food Drink food Drink food Drink food
2.
[TRANSCRIPTION UNAVAILABLE] So The other day I was making some lunch Got meat, got bread, now we're ready to munch But when I took a bite, everything seemed real dry If you know me, I'm not that kind of guy, so I opened up the refrigerator door Searching up and down for that little something more When it appeared in the middle of my view The mayonnaise that I had bought brand new I squirted it onto the sandwich But I got a little bit of it on my hand, which I licked, but-- HOLD UP! Something's not right Mouth burning, and though it's slight If my taste buds could speak, they'd scream with all their might, cause I can't eat that mayo, I'm white! That's some spicy mayonnaise That's some spicy mayonnaise That's some spicy mayonnaise That's some spicy mayonnaise Okay So maybe I should Consider my choices for my own good I throw out the sandwich, go back to the table This time I will read the back of the label Now I'm in the backyard at my grill With a sirloin steak in hand that's been chilled Place the meat slab on the roaring flame Salt and pepper's the name of the game! Now the steak's done, grill smoke in my lungs Cut it with my knife and put it on my tongue, and-- HOLD UP! My muscles snap tight I thought maybe this time I had done it right But the second I put that pepper near my face I had forgotten to consider my race! That's some spicy peppercorns That's some spicy peppercorns That's some spicy peppercorns That's some spicy peppercorns Now, my tongue is swollen and scarred All but destroyed, my taste buds slaughtered I go to take a drink from my water That's some spicy Poland Spring That's some spicy Poland Spring That's some spicy Poland Spring That's some spicy Poland Spring Too damn spicy for these lips Pale and dry like jerky strips I am Caucasian, excuse my dissuasion To consume this mayo which caused me abrasion This food is too spicy, the hospital's pricey I'm gonna go to bed before it gets dicey
3.
You know I be driving my Kia They're eating BK in the trunk While everyone was trying to be me-a I did a swap for another lunch Found it on the side of the highway yesterday And it's still looking good, I am dining gourmet, but Now there's a problem, I traded my drink In the BK cup with the ice, gotta think I looked in the back seat, what did I find? Collections of jars piled up sky high That's when I remember the magical juice Contained within that I was about to set loose I drank that piss! I drank it out the jar! But maybe this time I have gone too far I started feeling ill, I dropped to the ground My stomach started spinning and turning all around The piss is not happy! The piss is not healthy! Inside of me the piss is really tryna be stealthy It's gotten in my bloodstream, it's got no escape plan Now I am becoming a Super Duper Piss Man! It's running through my veins and it's taking the reins Pretty soon I'll be a slave to the Super Piss Game And now my belly's full with urine, you see So now you know you'd better call me Piss Man! Knocking over port-a-pottys, yes! Piss Man! Causing the construction workers stress Piss Man! Not gonna pay my rent Piss Man! Cause I'm gonna move into a tent Piss Man! Drinking all the piss I can find Piss Man! On Piss Patrol full time Piss Man! Pop the gas cap of the Kia Piss Man! Fill it with Super Urea Feel like a rock star, best in the game So lets hit em up and take some names I go to the Piss Convention at the hotel And flex my dominance on these incels Nobody knows how to piss like me And nobody's gonna get this piss for free If you wanna piss like me, you gotta pay To learn to flow that piss the bhyper way $20 upfront to start the free trial Then $50 monthly to learn the piss style Of me, Super Piss Man, best on the coast I'll smoke you on the Piss Court, burnt like toast Piss Man! Besting all my opponents, yes! Piss Man! All my piss rivals are depressed Piss Man! Don't you know your piss career is over Piss Man! Don't you know it's time to get sober Piss Man! Better get out on the streets Piss Man! Or else forever take a seat Piss Man! You are not aiming for the toilet Piss Man, all your plans... I foiled it! I can piss 6 feet straight in the air Do not test me Do not best me I'm in the Piss Game I'm in the Super Piss Game Raining piss droplets on your cranium Yeah, I'm hard like germanium Holler at your boy Go and play with your toys Yeah, go and practice your piss technique
4.
HOT CAR 01:52
I am gonna lock you in a hot car Your skin burning up, turning black like tar, and You know I'm a pretty good guy But now you're in my car and you're gonna die No AC and no ventilation The window's not tinted, for humiliation The paint job is black, the windshield is cracked You now have 10 seconds left to react I'm gonna lock you in my hot car It'll get in the news and I'll be a star Soon you will perish to this interior Soon you will find that you are inferior Feel the heat in your seat Strapped in, seat belt, cooking like meat Like an ant under a magnifying glass Tonight I'll be eating your slow-cooked ass Yum Yum Yum Yum HUMAN FLESH! Yum Yum Yum Yum COOKED SO FRESH! I am gonna save your fucking neck bones And put them on the walls of my home I'm gonna lock you in my hot car It'll get in the news and I'll be a star Soon you will perish to this interior Soon you will find that you are inferior
5.
Swimming in the pool with the lights low Got diving board, but I don't like heights though Keeping it slow with the backstroke Keeping my head above water, I don't choke Wake up in my bed Dreams of the swimming pool still in my head Pin that shit, I'm in that shit Wake up sweating, tailspin that shit I have no pool and I must swim All these desires come from within Inside the pool is beauty and wonder Just wanna take the plunge and dive under Took my ass to Poolholics Anonymous That way nobody will ever make fun of us We shake hands and sit in folding chairs In a circle, we exchange our greatest despairs Driving back home all alone Looking real shifty, tryna be thrifty I see a sign right next to Exit 50 "Pool Supplies On Sale!" Turned that wheel so fast it made skid marks Pull up to the place and put it in park I step up to the forbidden shop Start to turn the handle, but then it stops FUCK! The store's locked tight It's half past 12 on a Sunday night Defeated, I sulk back to my car Cry myself to sleep under blankets of stars I have no pool and I must swim All these desires come from within Inside the pool is beauty and wonder Just wanna take the plunge and dive under I have no pool and I must swim All these desires come from within Inside the pool is beauty and wonder Just wanna take the plunge and dive under
6.
GAMER 4 LYFE 02:36
Tilt the stick and watch the head flick I'm slick like a dick, I catch you real quick Razer mouse and Corsair keyboard To the PC connected with USB cord Gamer 4 Lyfe, I condescend to The little motherfuckers who cannot bend to My wishes of getting this Chicken Dinner Turn on the hacks, I'm a fidget spinner CS:GO, Fortnite, Halo 3 PUBG, Garry's Mod, TTT In my gaming chair I can do no wrong That's why I'm singing you this song Well, slap my nuts and call me Shirley My mommy's making me go to bed so early Take off the headset and go to my room Tomorrow I will be the bringer of doom 3 in the morning, I'm fast asleep Dreaming about the noobs I'll sweep the floor with I'm so sharp, I got my own blacksmith I am the wisecracksmith Practiced, got a lot of nerve to call me unpracticed Now I will stab you like the big cactus Now I will make you seethe with no tactics I'm thick like X axis My oh my, your malding levels are too high Better keep em real low or you're gonna die Well, maybe now that the end is nigh I'll tell you "bye bye"! You have died in vidya game You put your family to shame Open my eyes, it's 6:02 in the morning Woken up with no warning Alarm is buzzing in my ears, won't stop So I snooze the shit with my karate chop Gamer 4 Lyfe, I use precision and pour Cereal into the bowl, my provision Now I got nutrition, I'm on a mission To crush all these noobs with my mommy's permission steampowered.com, got the hookup Click Counter Strike, now I got to look up The callouts for dust2 and inferno This guy's profile picture is Cirno Hit the headshots, then call it a day This game sure is real fun to play Unplug the PC and put it away Now they all know that I am not gay You have died in vidya game You put your family to shame
7.
CHALK 02:03
I'm choking! It hurts so good Chalk in my throat, now it's right where it should Collapse on the ground in the place where I stood I'm a real laughingstock of the neighborhood, yeah Chalk in my my mouth and chalk in my soul Put it on a plate or put it in a bowl Step on that chalk, how quaint, with my soles Put it on my tongue and swallow it whole Cook it real slow on the sidewalk Write me some words like John Hancock Look on the shelves like a watchhawk Until I find some real good chalk Now it's Thanksgiving, we're having a feast Chalk is my religion, I am the chalk priest Chalk makes my large penis rise like the yeast Chalk turns a little man into a beast Crayons? Pens? Fuck that, chalk My spirits raise sky high like the beanstalk Pull up to the club, I got the damn chalk Get down on the dance floor and do the crip walk Cook it real slow on the sidewalk Write me some words like John Hancock Look on the shelves like a watchhawk Until I find some real good chalk Cook it real slow on the sidewalk Write me some words like John Hancock Look on the shelves like a watchhawk Until I find some real good chalk

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released April 17, 2020

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bhyper New York, New York

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